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Again, I am happy to share with you the following paragraph from Exchange Everyday.

Teaching Without Hurting
October 10, 2008

A half truth is a whole lie.
Yiddish Proverb

In her new book, Don’t Get Upset! Help Young Children Manage Their Feelings by Understanding Your Own (Redleaf Press), Tamar Jacobson offers this commentary on discipline:

“Children love their mamas and papas. So why do we hurt children to teach them? For example, when they are very young, and they learn to curse by imitating the group of adults they adore, why do we wash their mouths out with soap, put pepper on their tongues, or inflict other such punishment? Why can’t we, instead, hold young children close and seriously, earnestly, tell them that we love them and that when they use those curse words, it makes us all feel unsafe?
Young children need adults for their survival. They need us to approve of a nd love them, to guide them with kindness and compassion so that they will grow to be humane. Thinking of those innocent, trusting, yearning, curious, mischievous, needy eyes, I wonder why we hurt children to teach them.”

 

I had the opportunity to meet Tamar Jacboson over a year ago. I couldn’t agree with the above paragraph more. As a parent, you receive so many conflicting messages, from letting our children cry themeselves to sleep to not cuddling them because we want children to be independent. If your heart is telling you to hold your child close even when the world seems to think rocking a four year old is a bad idea, please continue to do so because in the end, children grow up so quickly and they need the time to just be children.

Thank You Tamar!

Posted on October 11th, 2008 by karen
Filed under: Uncategorized